The Coffee Nazi - Laguna Beach
On the north end of Laguna Beach, in a small shopping area called 'Boat Canyon' is an incredible coffee place called Jean Paul's Goodies. JP has been there almost 20 years and has kicked out some of Laguna's most premier residents. When I first saw the Seinfeld episode on the Soup Nazi I thought.... those s.o.b.'s stole our story.
JP makes the best coffee in town... I know.... everyone says that, but this is for sure! It is really potent and if you have more than one you may start getting the shakes. I think 5 will send you to the emergency ward. Anyway, when you order the coffee, you get the same thing no matter what you ask for. He only makes it one way and in only one size and adds half and half. Don't get him started by asking for low fat or you will be excommunicated.... and that is forever.
He has a separate coffee pot with crap coffee and some of his coffee mistakes that he sells for a buck and calls it 'construction workers coffee'. He usually can tell which category you fall in and when you first ask for a cup, he will say.... 'oh.. you want construction workers coffee' and with a sneer, slides it over to you.
The good stuff is 2 bucks and there is no tip jar. He thinks that is bad luck. Only JP works in the store and he is open 6-1/2 days a week. He opens around 5:45 and closes anywhere from 3:30 to 5 during the week and noon on Sunday.
Once he knows you, your coffee will be waiting for you on the counter. He watches when people pull up and gets their goodies ready for them by the time they enter. He also knows all of our personal business and when there are problems, he connects you up with the person that can solve your problem. He also acts as a mailbox.... we will leave various books and packages and messages for other people.
About 8 years ago he had me buy a computer for him. He learned how to use it and then became Mr Hardware expert. If he knew you had a problem with your computer, he would go to your home after hours and get your computer fixed up. Funny..... if you asked him over for dinner, he would always have some excuse as to why he could not make it... but tell him your computer had a problem and he would always show up. Your problem became his problem until he solved it.
JP's birthday is the day after mine. Every year we would celebrate this by having him over (the first time or 2, I had to tell him I h,ad a computer problem), and the 3 of us (my wife Janet) would have a lobster dinner which we actually made him cook. Somehow, over the years, this has become a tradition, and the most recent birthday included about 6 other friends from his shop. There is a whole mini society with lots of stories around the 'Coffee Nazi' and I will be recording them from time to time. In the meantime, stop by, but be sure to be careful what you ask for. Unless you see it don't ask for it. Especially do not ask for Bagels and Cream Cheese or you will get the standard reply.... "...oh.. you want your shit on shit? Get out and go across the street to the Coffee Bean!"
You can find me there most days..... I am the guy with the White Standard Poodle.
JP makes the best coffee in town... I know.... everyone says that, but this is for sure! It is really potent and if you have more than one you may start getting the shakes. I think 5 will send you to the emergency ward. Anyway, when you order the coffee, you get the same thing no matter what you ask for. He only makes it one way and in only one size and adds half and half. Don't get him started by asking for low fat or you will be excommunicated.... and that is forever.
He has a separate coffee pot with crap coffee and some of his coffee mistakes that he sells for a buck and calls it 'construction workers coffee'. He usually can tell which category you fall in and when you first ask for a cup, he will say.... 'oh.. you want construction workers coffee' and with a sneer, slides it over to you.
The good stuff is 2 bucks and there is no tip jar. He thinks that is bad luck. Only JP works in the store and he is open 6-1/2 days a week. He opens around 5:45 and closes anywhere from 3:30 to 5 during the week and noon on Sunday.
Once he knows you, your coffee will be waiting for you on the counter. He watches when people pull up and gets their goodies ready for them by the time they enter. He also knows all of our personal business and when there are problems, he connects you up with the person that can solve your problem. He also acts as a mailbox.... we will leave various books and packages and messages for other people.
About 8 years ago he had me buy a computer for him. He learned how to use it and then became Mr Hardware expert. If he knew you had a problem with your computer, he would go to your home after hours and get your computer fixed up. Funny..... if you asked him over for dinner, he would always have some excuse as to why he could not make it... but tell him your computer had a problem and he would always show up. Your problem became his problem until he solved it.
JP's birthday is the day after mine. Every year we would celebrate this by having him over (the first time or 2, I had to tell him I h,ad a computer problem), and the 3 of us (my wife Janet) would have a lobster dinner which we actually made him cook. Somehow, over the years, this has become a tradition, and the most recent birthday included about 6 other friends from his shop. There is a whole mini society with lots of stories around the 'Coffee Nazi' and I will be recording them from time to time. In the meantime, stop by, but be sure to be careful what you ask for. Unless you see it don't ask for it. Especially do not ask for Bagels and Cream Cheese or you will get the standard reply.... "...oh.. you want your shit on shit? Get out and go across the street to the Coffee Bean!"
You can find me there most days..... I am the guy with the White Standard Poodle.
posted by photoman at 10:54 PM
1 Comments:
Photoman has captured JP in words. But you must see him in person and in action to believe this man...
Not only does Jean-Paul consistently make the best coffee I have drunk in America, but he does it ALONE, 7 days a week, beginning at 0530 or so in the morning. Maybe 6 holidays off a year. No vacation. No surprise closures. Illness? JP doesn't know the meaning of the word...
He bakes pastries and savories, seasonal cakes, and various dishes that continue to surprise. He scrubs the floor.
He sells French magazines. You want to remember, at your peril, these are to buy, not to casually leaf through...
If you wonder whether this is a good place to gather for coffee, and talk, check the number of regulars who have staked out a personal chair at a given time of day. I'm the guy reading the book in the back corner around noon....DAY
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